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Duck Sidelined for Foul Play

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Duck Sidelined for Foul Play

By Scott Friedstein, FluffPo Correspondent

According to sources, Ted the duck has been ejected from yet another game of pickup basketball for playing too dirty. Ever the competitor, Ted has proven notorious on the basketball court for his overly aggressive style.

“We warned him beforehand to tone it down,” says teammate Anthony Marsh. “But around the second quarter, he started with the usual stuff. Throwing elbows, trash talking. Fouling on purpose. Someone had to take him out.”

The duck was swiftly directed to the sidelines, where he continued shouting at players.

“They had to hold him back,” says Marsh. “I’m all for being competitive, but Ted always takes it way too far. If he wants to play again, he’s going to have to learn to cool it.”

Via pawpawprowlhowl. Originally published on HelloGiggles.

Corgi Playdate Goes Awry

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Corgi Playdate Goes Awry

By Scott Friedstein, FluffPo Correspondent

Lana the corgi just wanted a friend to play with.

Bored with the usual 9-to-5 grind, the dog logged on to Craigslist to find out about local playdate opportunities in her area.

“She found another corgi that was willing to meet up,” says Jen Dwyer, a friend. “There weren’t any pictures attached to the posting, though. Guess that should have been a red flag.”

Indeed, the playmate that greeted Lana last week was not a corgi at all. At least, not technically.

“It was a stuffed corgi,” says Dwyer. “It took a few minutes for Lana to realize, but once she did, she was really disappointed. I’ll tell you, the Internet can be a weird place sometimes.”

Via @lanathecorgi.

Dog Reunited With Lawn

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Dog Reunited With Lawn

By Scott Friedstein, FluffPo Correspondent

In her old age, Kiki the dog has seen just about everything. Even so, she probably wasn’t expecting the surprise that awaited her late last week – the old lawn she used to romp on as a puppy.

“We’d heard about Kiki and knew she’d been trying to track down her old lawn,” says Meg Horton, host of Reunions on the Oxygen Network. “Apparently they’d been separated for some time. We knew we could help her out.”

Using official records and photographs provided by the dog, producers were able to locate the quarter-acre plot in the town of Allenhurst, NJ.

“Kiki didn’t believe us when we told her we found it,” says Horton. “She had to see it for herself, and luckily our cameras were there when she did. She was so happy. And the new owners didn’t seem to mind.”

Via doubleUU.

Doggie Bandits Make Clean Getaway

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Doggie Bandits Make Clean Getaway

By Scott Friedstein, FluffPo Correspondent

According to reports, a family of dogs known as the Tennessee Mutts are still at large after robbing a local Petco. The career criminals and golden retrievers have become notorious in the greater Dallas area for their brazen thefts, mostly involving rawhide.

Witnesses say the dogs entered the store around noon, cleverly disguised as employees. 

“I really didn’t think much of it at the time,” says Gina Rudd. “But then people started shouting, ‘Get those dogs!’ Apparently they’d taken all the rawhide. But they were just too quick.”

Authorities tell The Fluffington Post that the Mutts snatched around $500 worth of treats before driving off in a rented Ford F150.

“We’re telling everyone to be on the lookout,” says Deputy Sheriff Roy Hardwick. “If you see a family of golden retrievers randomly hanging out in the bed of a pickup truck, please contact the local authorities. Do not, and I repeat, do not Instagram it – you’ll only encourage them.”

Via yellowarrior. Originally published on HelloGiggles.

Ferret Cast in ‘Hangover’ Sequel

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Ferret Cast in ‘Hangover’ Sequel

By Scott Friedstein, FluffPo Correspondent

The Hangover Part III may be hitting theaters later this month, but that hasn’t stopped studio executives from planning yet another sequel. Early word is that The Hangover: Ferrets has already been greenlit, and its lead actor cast.

“We really wanted Part III to be the last one” says producer Daniel Goldberg. “The thing is, the demand for ferret comedies is huge right now. We’d be dumb to pass up an opportunity like this.”

The film will star Hollywood heavyweight Eddie as a ferret who parties a bit too hard one evening, and must retrace his steps to find his missing ferret buddy. 

“It’s a real nightmare situation,” says Goldberg. “His friend’s gone, his hotel suite’s trashed, and there’s a Bengal tiger just roaming around. Plus there’s a baby ferret that randomly showed up overnight. Never a good thing.”

Rated R for language and comic mischief involving ferrets, The Hangover: Ferrets is slated for a summer 2014 release.

Via Lynahe.