Cat Nutella Thief Still At Large
By Scott Friedstein, FluffPo Correspondent
According to authorities, Freckles the cat is still on the loose after a rash of Nutella-related thefts in the D.C. Metro area. Described as orange and white with an insatiable love of hazelnuts, Freckles has evaded capture for the the better part of a month. As residents tell The Fluffington Post, the cat strikes randomly, never hitting the same house twice.
“He was here just the other day,” says Gladys Goodwin. “I came into the kitchen, and there he was. I told him, ‘You get away from my Nutella!’ But he’d already eaten most of it by then.”
Despite being largely at a loss, police are trying to stay one step ahead of the cat.
“He’s already taken most of the Nutella,” says Chief of Police Barry Swanson. “But if my instincts are right, he’s eventually going to need one other thing: Toast. We’re telling people to make as much of it as possible. If all goes according to plan, we’ll have Freckles by next week. Or just a lot of toast. Only time will tell.”