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Dog Buys Boat for Summer

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Dog Buys Boat for Summer

by Scott Friedstein, FluffPo Correspondent

When warm weather hits, most dogs are content with some fresh water and air conditioning.

Not Ollie.

Faced with yet another boring summer, the pup finally broke down and bought what he always said he’d buy – his very own boat.

“Yeah, he’s been mentioning it for years,” says Brent Milligan, a friend. “I never thought he’d actually do it.”

Furnished with doggie necessities, the vessel boasts a 25 hp engine, bucket seats and built-in GPS. There was one thing it didn’t include, however – a driver.

“That’s the thing with boats, unfortunately,” says Milligan. “He’s going to be really disappointed once he finds out.”

Via dapope_0109.

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Cat’s Rapid Transit System Could Reduce Dependency on Fossil Fuels

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Cat’s Rapid Transit System Could Reduce Dependency on Fossil Fuels

Dr. Boots, a researcher and cat at MIT, has unveiled what energy industry experts are calling a “game changer.”

“Imagine a transit system completely independent of gasoline,” says Ashley Moore, a writer who covers energy matters for The Washington Post. “Well, yes, I suppose Tesla is doing that too. But, Dr. Boots’ system is powered by dogs.”

Hop on a dog at any Canine Docking Station and ride it to your destination. Drop the dog off at the receiving end and go about your business. No gas, no parking, no hassle.

“I suppose only cats and other small animals would really be able to take advantage of a system like this,” admits Moore. “And you’ll need an awful lot of dog food to power it, which ultimately requires fossil fuels to produce. But – yeah, I guess it’s not really that great after all." 

Via neonicblast.

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REPORT: Rabbit Allergy Season in Full Swing

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REPORT: Rabbit Allergy Season in Full Swing

by Scott Friedstein, FluffPo Correspondent

According to experts, the dreaded rabbit allergy season has returned – this time, with a vengeance.

“We’re seeing bunnies with a full range of symptoms,” says Dr. Alan Speck. “Watery eyes, sneezing, runny nose – it’s all there. I don’t think I’ve ever seen it this bad.”

As always, sufferers are advised to use over-the-counter remedies and drink plenty of fluids.

“If I were a rabbit right now, I’d hop to the nearest pharmacy and really just stock up,” says Speck. “Medically speaking, this season’s gonna be a doozy.”

As with previous years, the spate is expected to last well into autumn before giving way to otter flu season.

Via Eric Sonstroem.

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Fan Favorite Panda Voted Off of ‘Panda Island’ Reality Series

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Fan Favorite Panda Voted Off of ‘Panda Island’ Reality Series

Warning: this post contains spoilers for those who haven’t seen last night’s episode of Panda Island.

Last night provided the biggest shock of the season on Panda Island, the latest mega-hit reality show from Marc Burnett. After two hours of deliberation, the Elder Council sent fan favorite panda, Chubs, to the Hibernation Villa, ending his 5-week run on the program.

“Everyone loves Chubs,” said Entertainment Weekly television writer Amelia Scoggins, “so it was a bit of a shock to see him voted off so early.”

On the other hand, said Scoggins, Chubs was a drain on his team. The bear had finished last in the four of the previous six Ursine Challenges. 

Fans took to social media to voice their displeasure.

“Noooooooo! Not Chubs! #BoycottPI” read one tweet, using a popular protest hashtag that was tweeted 74,000 times, according to social media analytics firm Crimson Hexagon.

“FUUUUUUU! i hate the elder council. )): #ChubsForever” read another. It was retweeted 460 times.

“It will be interesting to see if the show takes a ratings dip next week,” said Scoggins. “Smart money says no, though. People just can’t get enough of Panda Island.”

Via explore.org.

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