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Cat’s Online Shopping Addiction Leads to Bankruptcy

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Cat’s Online Shopping Addiction Leads to Bankruptcy

A cat named Sparky from Rahway, NJ has racked up a debt of $36,000 after a four-day binge on ecommerce sites like Amazon and Zappos.

“Piles of boxes just started showing up at our apartment, maybe 10 to 15 per day,” says Ken Philips, Sparky’s roommate. “I asked him if he could afford all this stuff, but he wasn’t worried at the time.”

When the compound interest on his credit cards started kicking in, that’s when Sparky knew he was in trouble. The cat filed for bankruptcy within four months, and the online retailers are in the process of reclaiming their goods.

“You’ve got to live within your means,” says Philips. “I think this was a big lesson for Sparky.”

Submitted by Paulina Brusca.

Tensions Run High In Backyard Standoff

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Tensions Run High In Backyard Standoff

Sources on the ground near the patio door are reporting that a three-hour standoff between cat and dog factions has grown in intensity.

“The cats are holding their ground firm,” says Clinton Selvy, a witness who is observing from a save distance. “They won’t let the dogs back into the house. But the dogs are holding the line, likely as a matter of pride.”

There are unconfirmed rumors that the dogs may attempt to sneak in, perhaps through the side door.

Submitted by Matt Wilfinger.

Santa Reveals Plans to Deliver Cats, Not Coal, to Naughty Kids

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Santa Reveals Plans to Deliver Cats, Not Coal, to Naughty Kids

The North Pole has issued a press release outlining Santa Claus’s plan to stop delivering coal to children on his Christmas Eve naughty list. Citing the rising cost of fuel and the detrimental impact of coal mining on the environment, Mr. Claus explains that he will be switching to cats.

“We believe waking up to a cranky cat in your stocking is a much more effective deterrent of naughty behavior,” reads the release. Neither Mr. Claus nor his representatives were available for further comment.

Via AuthenticWiggidyWack.

Local Kitten Will Sleep Anywhere, Anytime

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Local Kitten Will Sleep Anywhere, Anytime

Sammy, a kitten from Vermont, has issued a statement letting it be known that he will sleep anywhere, anytime.

“He’s basically challenging us to find a place where he can’t sleep,” said random man-on-the-street Andy Rios.  "I’m sure if we put our heads together, we could come up with some places that would be pretty inhibitive to sleep.  Then again… I mean, look at him.  He’s a champ.“

Via Michael W. May.