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Puppy Demands Living Wage For Tricks

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Puppy Demands Living Wage For Tricks

by Scott Friedstein, FluffPo Correspondent

According to sources, Finley the dog has completely ceased all cute activity until demands are met by his owner.

“He was always such a fun puppy,” said Kathy Monroe. “Then he realized he wasn’t getting anything in return for doing tricks. That’s when it kind of all started.”

First on the pup’s agenda: A living wage.

“My client maintains that he simply cannot continue being an adorable dog without fair compensation,” said Ralph Sagher, the puppy’s attorney. “It is in his owner’s best interests to begin paying Finley at once for his services, preferably in bones.”

Monroe isn’t so quick to give in.

“Look, I don’t think asking for a paw shake is out of line,” the first-time owner said. “After all, I do basically everything for him. That puppy’s got some nerve, if you ask me.”

Sagher countered:

“Oh, please. Typical owner talk,” said the thrice-disbarred litigator. “She can argue all she wants, but we’re not going to roll over. And yes, you can print that.”

Via salmon789.

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Dog Attempts Camouflage, Fails

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Dog Attempts Camouflage, Fails

By Scott Friedstein, FluffPo Correspondent

Frank the dog did not want to go to the vet.

Rather than employing the same old tactics, however, he decided to try something a bit different – camouflage.

“He’d been watching some nature documentaries about animals that can blend in with their surroundings,” says owner Karen Black. “He thought it’d be easy to do the same thing.”

It wasn’t. Upon seeing Black with keys in hand, Frank darted to the nearest houseplant – only to be found seconds later.

“I guess you have to give him points for effort,” says Black. “It’s not his fault his sense of color is off. Still, it was funny watching him try to actually blend in.”

Black was not available for further comment as she had left to look for Frank, who was just lying on the carpet a second ago.

Via Tony Alter.

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Dog’s Magic Powers Exposed as Hoax

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Dog’s Magic Powers Exposed as Hoax

A German Shepherd named Ty has been drawing crowds to the lakeside town of Dell, IL for years.

“He can walk on water. I’ve seen it,” says Casey Lannigan, a local resident, who witnessed Ty’s feats of magic with her family numerous times.

But a scathing indictment in the town’s local paper has brought Ty’s “powers” into question.

“It seems Ty’s water walking abilities are most evident in the winter,” writes Dell Daily Herald columnist Hank Otis in the latest edition. “And when pressed to walk on the lake in warmer months, the dog simply shrugs and curls up for a nap. It’s time to admit that walking on a frozen lake isn’t supernatural. It’s just fun.”

Via ErrorlessGnome.

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