dogs

Saint Louis puppy Burt Macklin immediately terminated his cable package late Sunday afternoon after he was stuck at home with nothing to watch but live TV.

“He had the sniffles so he couldn’t get out to the park for his usual walkies,” says Cynthia O’Donnell, a source familiar with the situation. “He sat in front of the tube and watched about seven hours of daytime television. He was not the same after that.”

The programming horrified him, according to witnesses. Insipid talk shows, infomercials, reality shlock, B movies and reruns flooded every station.

“And the commercials,” says O’Donnell. “They’re everywhere.”

Macklin reportedly applied the savings on his cable bill toward a Hulu Plus subscription and an Internet speed upgrade, though The Fluffington Post could not confirm the megabit download rate at the time of publication.

Via chimygoldengram.

Via liastaffiedoggie.

After suffering a crushing defeat in the Democratic primary that pundits say was “completely expected” (she didn’t appear on any ballots), Bella the dog is now saying she’ll run as an independent candidate for president in the fall.

A spokesperson told The Fluffington Post that even though Bella won zero delegates in the primary, she intends to “continue bringing her message of hope, equality, and belly rubs for everyone to the world.”

Political analysts think there might be something else to her decision to stay in the race despite overwhelming odds.

“There’s no doubt she’s a very good dog,” said MSNBC political commentator Stacie Copley. “But I think the real reason Bella is staying in the race is that she loves campaigning. I mean, she absolutely loves it. All the car rides, especially. She’s in heaven when she’s on the trail.”

Via bella_thebulldog_.