Influential Scientific Paper Written by Parakeet

Influential Scientific Paper Written by Parakeet

The academic community was rocked Tuesday afternoon when respected biologist Dr. Jeffrey Franz admitted that he is not the author of a critical thesis on toxicology.

“I have lived with this shame for two years,” Franz told reporters at a press conference. “And I can’t deny Ziggy his due any longer.”

He was referring to his colleague, Dr. Ziggy, a parakeet who has studied the effects of pollutants on marine life his entire career. His authorship of the paper has been restored, and the Global Science Tribunal will consider revoking Dr. Franz’s membership card in the coming weeks.

Submitted by Josie Bonventre.