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BREAKING: Cat Enters Tense Standoff With String, Cops

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BREAKING: Cat Enters Tense Standoff With String, Cops

According to numerous verified tweets from the scene, a 6-month-old cat named Max has engaged a nearby string in what authorities expect to be a grueling, hours-long standoff.

“I cant even beleeve what i’m seeing but theres a cat here and he is gonna mess that string up!!” read one tweet from user @spicy_pickles14

“Police are everywhere…what’s their next move?” read another from @JimmyGil.

As of this writing, authorities on the scene could not be reached for comment. The Fluffington Post will update you as this story develops.

Submitted by Dan.

Puppy’s Self-Arranged Birthday Party Was Elaborate Hoax

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Puppy’s Self-Arranged Birthday Party Was Elaborate Hoax

Linkie, a pup from Tucson, AZ, made some waves in his social circle late Wednesday afternoon when the surprise birthday party he threw for himself was revealed to be a sham.

“We thought it was weird that none of his actualfriends were invited,” says Ralph Kilroy. “So when we got wind of the party, a few of us decided to crash. Turns out, he had just set up a bunch of stuffed animals to make it look like he was super popular.”

News of the party hoax spread quickly on Facebook, where Linkie’s friends proceeded to tag themselves as plush toys in the photos.

“He was pretty embarrassed about it, but I think he learned a good lesson,” says Kilroy.

Submitted by Ryan Maza.

Mystery Cat Accidentally Filed in Sci-Fi Section

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Mystery Cat Accidentally Filed in Sci-Fi Section

The second floor hallway library has released a statement indicating that a mystery cat has been accidentally filed under speculative fiction. The error was discovered by Jean Pierre-Luc, a feline historian, while searching for the cat in the mystery section and coming up empty handed.

“This is a disaster,” said Pierre-Luc. “He’s clearly a mystery kitty. What was he doing in science fiction?”

According to Pierre-Luc, the mistake itself is easily corrected, but it points to an systemic failure in the library department of the household. That, he said, will be harder to fix.

Via house_of_cats.

Dog’s Strange Hobby May Be Most Boring Ever

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Dog’s Strange Hobby May Be Most Boring Ever

Kooper the dog likes to watch the grass grow. Literally. The puppy discovered his passion for watching things grow when he sprouted a lima bean in 3rd grade science class. Since then, he’s been hooked.

“Oh he’ll sit out there for hours, with his nose in the grass, not blinking or moving a muscle,” said friend Agnes Wizzle. “Sometimes he’ll pause to take some measurements and jot them down in his notebook.”

According to Wizzle, Kooper’s favorite types of grass are Kentucky Bluegrass and Tall Fescue. The dog plans to attend the University of Iowa next fall and pursue a degree in turf management.

Via mariainzunzag.