Kitten Implicated In Financial Malfeasance
Julliet, the kitten CEO of hedge fund Cuddle Capital, LP, has been accused by the SEC of short-selling toxic assets based on insider information.
“We’re not at liberty to disclose all the details of this investigation, and no arrests have been made,” Connor Black, an SEC spokesperson, said at a press conference on Sunday. “But this is a very serious matter, and we will be taking every step to ensure that kittens who engage in financial collusion pay the appropriate penalty.”
Via Pacificat Ragdolls.
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