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Dog Waits Patiently a Record 5 Hours for Treat

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Sparky the dog set a world record over the weekend when he waited patiently for a treat for five solid hours. The record has been confirmed by Guinness World Records.

“I told him to sit, and he did, and usually he gets a treat after that,” said roommate Clara Pines. “But then the phone rang and I totally forgot about Sparky. I went out and did some errands, came back hours later and he was still there.”

Guinness officials said it would have been impossible to confirm the record under normal circumstances, but a Nest security cam recorded the pup’s epic wait.

“He’s a really good boy,” said Pines.

Via mashiukotori.

Dog’s Home Makeover Show ‘Too Fluffy,’ Say Critics

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In an era of extreme home renovation, property flipping experts and reality TV about the harsh realities of real estate, domestic guru BIBI the Pomeranian’s new HGTV offering “Fluff It Up” has left critics unimpressed.

“The network bills it as a design aspiration series,” says Kimberly Cather, a TV critic for E! Online. “But every episode is BIBI just going to Target and buying the fluffiest things she can possibly find. She comes back to the client’s house and just tosses the fluff everywhere haphazardly. Rinse, lather, repeat, and you’ve got a whole season of, well, fluff.”

Ian Jackson, entertainment reporter for People Magazine agrees. “There was one show where she gave a chair a ‘makeover’ by draping a feather boa on the back. That was it. That was the whole show. I mean, I know reality TV has gotten bad. But, come on.”

Subsequently, Jackson added, “Seriously.”

via @bowpup

Feline Presidential Candidate Falls Asleep During Press Conference

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Dusky, a cat running for president of the U.S. as a Democrat, fell asleep during a press conference on her foreign policy yesterday.

“She was in the middle of talking about proposed yarn sanctions on Iran,” said Washington Post reporter Toby Willits, “when she just nodded off.”

Dusky remained asleep for a good three hours, during which time reporters were apparently unsure how to react.

“Do we just wait for her to wake up?” said Willits. “Was it going to be rescheduled? Should we try running the can opener to wake her up? We had no idea.”

Campaign officials have taken the blame for the somnolent gaffe. “In retrospect, we probably shouldn’t have held the press conference from on top of all those pillows,” said campaign communications director Sara Ramos.

Via Svedek.