dogs

Pug Becomes Living Billboard to Make Holiday Cash

Hamilton the pug needed some holiday spending money, so the intrepid dog hatched a plan to become a living billboard on the Internet.

“He already had a fairly sizable Instragram following,” said his close friend, Tory Smythe. “So he leveraged that to spread the message about his services.”

Hamilton hasn’t yet closed a deal, but Smythe said he’s had plenty of interest from retailers interested in doing some extra Christmas marketing.

Editor’s Note: This pug really is named Hamilton, but he’s not selling his marketing services to earn spending money – the photo above was actually part of a campaign to raise money for the Curly Tail Pug Rescue and the Ohio Pug Rescue (his rescuers!). Please consider donating, and follow Hamilton on Instagram.

Pomeranian Mounts Campaign Against Attention-Grabbing Baby

A Pomeranian pup named Pica had mounted a legal campaign against a baby that her lawyers claim has “forcefully and maliciously stolen” from the dog.

According to Pica’s legal team, the baby has allegedly usurped the puppy’s place as the cutest member of the household, and thus taken much of the privilege that role entails.

“She no longer gets extra treats, her walks in the park are half the time they used to be, and forget about getting any attention from visitors,” said lawyer Casey Litton. “That all went out the window as soon as that baby arrived.”

Pica is seeking compensatory damages in $2 million range and immediate removal of the child.

Via pica_the_pom.

PHOTO OP: Food or Not Food?

Via schnuggles.

For Brooklyn Dog, Hanukkah Is All About the Jelly Donuts

Friend of a Brooklyn dog named Morrie say that he has lost site of the true meaning of Hanukkah.

“For him it’s not about the celebration of a miracle,” said close friend Elisha Mendelson. “It’s not even about the presents. It’s just about the food. Latkes, sure, but mainly the sufganiyot. Boy, does that pup have a sweet tooth.”

According to Mendelson, Morrie can down seven or eight of the traditional jelly-filled donuts – each night. 

“It adds up,” she said. “By the time we’re lighting that last candle, he’s noticeably heavier.”

Via istolethetv.

Scientists Discover Happiest Puppy

Twice in the past editors at The Fluffington Post have thought they had discovered the happiest dog on earth: once a year ago and then again four months ago. Not so, say scientists at Sapienza University of Rome, who point to Ellie, whose happiness levels are off the charts.

“Ellie may literally be the happiest dog alive right now,” said researcher Salvatore Magliocco. “Ellie’s showing extremely elevated levels of serotonin and an increased number of endorphins. She’s just really happy, all the time.”

Off the charts happy, according to Magliocco, who says that Ellie’s general mood is unprecedented. When compared to other dogs on record, Ellie is nearly twice as happy by most metrics.

“She never seems sad,” he said. “We’d expect this amount of happiness to come with some manic tendencies, but she’s all peaks, no valleys. This is just one happy dog!”

Via eduardo-suave.