dogs

Rhode Island Puppy Declared Best Dog Ever*

Einstein, an 8-week-old puppy from Rumford, RI, has been formally dubbed the best dog ever.* While the pup could not be reached for comment, sources close to the situation say he is thrilled by the announcement.

*By his owner.

Submitted by Chris Amesbury.

Canine Construction Workers’ Union Chides Layoffs

In a memo released today, the Canine Construction Workers’ Union of America (Local 47) repudiated The Sizemore Group for what it calls “penny-pinching layoffs.”

The real estate developer contracted union dogs to lay cement for five new housing complexes. After only two foundations were complete, the company let go of half the contractors, citing “unnecessary labor.”

The union says Sizemore is running the workers ragged, expecting the same results and speed from half the team.

“The work will end up being shoddy” says Jim Rockland, a union representative. “I wouldn’t want to live in a shoddy house, and I don’t expect Sizemore’s clients to either.”

Submitted by Donna Mary Nicholls.