dogs

Dog Finishes Internet, Finds the Whole Thing Kind of Boring

Darby, a local corgi pup, reportedly finished the entire Internet at 3:45 this afternoon.  According to sources close to the situation, he’s been browsing the web non-stop for the past 23 weeks and actually finished ahead of schedule.  Sources say that upon viewing the the last page of the last site, Darby let out a yawn, shrugged and went to play with a bone he had hidden behind the couch.

“He was clearly unimpressed.  I think especially once he got into the meme era, it started boring him – all that stuff about cats who can’t spell was totally not appealing to him,” says dog sociologist and behavior expert Terrence Gruber.  "On the other hand, he’s a dog, so who really knows what they’re thinking?“

Via z5.

PHOTO OP: Puppy on the Roof

Via CaptainLoud.

Playground Pup Clueless Over Slide

Schoolchildren laughed as they watched a local dog named Hercules try to use the playground slide in vain.

“He’s going up the wrong side,” 6-year-old Kelly Finch tells The Fluffington Post, holding back the giggles. “What a doof.”

Witnesses report that after a number of false starts, Hercules did manage to scamper half-way up the slide, only to slump back to the ground.

“Why won’t he use the ladder? I don’t know,” says Finch, looking defeated.

Via Hayley.

Dog to Kids: Get Off My Lawn

A chocolate lab named Coco was enjoying the warm weather from her porchside Adirondack chair when two neighborhood kids chased a ball into the front yard.

“She barked at us, really loud!” 9-year-old Jeffrey Cole tells The Fluffington Post. “She didn’t want us on the lawn.”

While Coco was well within her rights, some in the quiet, suburban neighborhood have voiced complaints.

“They’re just kids, they weren’t doing any harm,” says Janie Kellog, a neighbor who witnessed the incident. “That puppy is such a curmudgeon.”

Via Nikki Gabriel.