dogs

Puppy’s Road Trip Derailed by Engine Trouble

It was supposed to be a leisurely three week jaunt across the country to close out the summer before heading back to law school, but what started as a once-in-a-lifetime road trip has turned into a nightmare for Clancy the dog.

The puppy left Tucson, AZ in early August. The plan was to drive due east until he hit coastal South Carolina, head down the coast, and then fly back from Miami, FL. Unfortunately, he never got past the tiny town of Inola, OK, pop. 1,788. 

That’s where Clancy’s car broke down and he’s been stuck there ever since. Now $600 in debt, his car still hasn’t been fixed.

“I keep tellin’ him,” said mechanic Jason Wood in a phone interview, “his carburetor is shot, and those Power Wheels carbs are hard to come by. Been on backorder for weeks at the Mattel factory. Soon as it comes in, we’ll get him patched up and on the road.”

Clancy has been passing the time and earning extra money to put toward repairs by waiting tables at the local diner.

“He’s a peach,” said Mabel Perkins, who runs the lunch counter. “Sweetest dog I ever met. I sure hope that part comes in, but I’ll miss him when he’s gone.”

It is unlikely that Clancy will be able to finish his trip. He’ll head back to Arizona as soon as he’s able.

Via giorgiaguttuso.

BREAKING: Puppy to Replace Eli Manning as Giants’ QB

Those looking forward to this weekend’s “Manning Bowl III” will be disappointed. According to ESPN reporter Tim Schecter, the New York Giants will replace starting quarterback Eli Manning for Sunday’s upcoming game against the Denver Broncos with a puppy named Sparky. The Broncos offense is led by Eli’s elder brother Peyton.

According to Schecter, Giants coach Tom Coughlin confirmed the move. 

“I know it looks like he’s asleep,” Coughlin told Shecter of the dog, “but he’s a great passer and can get down the field in a hurry. We can do some really interesting things lining him up at running back, too.”

When asked why the Giants would take the unusual step of signing a relatively unknown – and non-human – player out of an independent league instead of using Curtis Painter or Ryan Nassib, who are already on the roster, Coughlin said it was a matter of agility.

“You saw how much pressure the Broncos pass rush put on the Ravens last week,” he said. “Sparky can really move around in the pocket. He runs a four three 40 and reads defenses like a champ.”

Eli Manning is coming off a disappointing week one performance, in which he threw 3 interceptions, while his older brother had a brilliant 462 yard, 7 touchdown game to start the season. This would have been just the third time that the two Mannings had met on the field.

Via dro3000.

Singing Dachshund Family Embarks on National Tour

Thanks to a viral YouTube video that shot ‘round the Internet in June, a family of musical dachshunds have signed with a manager, a small record label, and will tour the country this November.

“They’re like the Von Trapps of dachshunds,” says the family’s new publicist Mary Fogelbert. “Except less Austrian and way more fun.”

Dubbed “The Canine Crooners,” the pups will sing in 19 U.S. cities, starting in Charlotte, NC.

“They mostly do the classics, but there are a few original songs in the setlist,” says Fogelbert.

Via vinkulelu.

PHOTO OP: By a Nose

Via dizziee_and_jinxx.

PHOTO OP: The Fast and the Furriest

Via odette__vega.