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Duckling Refuses to Reciprocate High-Fives
Area residents were miffed on Tuesday when their offers to high-five a baby duck were coldly rebuffed.
“People tried high-fives, low-fives, medium-fives,” says Cam Stokes, who offered his hand to the duckling more than once. “It’s just rude, is what it is.”
Via Tarrog.
Owl Sick of Tootsie Roll Pop Queries
“Bernard would like to make it very clear that he has no idea how many licks it takes to get to the center of a Tootsie Roll Pop,” said press agent Adam Danovic on a media call this morning. "He would thank all children and woodland creatures to stop asking him.“
According to Danovic, Bernard, a local owl, has been bothered by the "Tootsie Roll” questions for years. "Ever since that damnable commercial came out in the 1980s, my client has been asked that question by every kid and turtle in the tri-state area,“ said Danovic by email.
When asked how many licks does it take to get to the center, Danovic responded tersely: "The world may never know.”
Via zbdh12.
Cockatoo’s Avante-Garde Hairstyle Turning Heads
Millicent the Cockatoo has long been known for her cutting edge style, and her latest hairdo is once again turning heads from Paris to Milan. The bird’s boisterous bouffant is the talk of the avian fashion circuit.
“Millicent is a vanguard of bird style,” said Marianne Despereaux, French editor of Bird Vogue. “She is truly a trendsetter for birds everywhere.”
Via cuatrok77.
Penguin Inspirational Speaker Draws Sell-Out Crowds
Magellan, an inspirational speaker and penguin from New South Wales in Australia, has been drawing sell-out crowds during his current American tour. At last night’s stop in Roanoke, VA, at least 2,000 birds showed up to hear him speak and tonight’s engagement in Baltimore, MD is standing room only.
“Mags is just charismatic,” said Newsday entertainment writer P.J. Giroux, who has been chronicling the bird’s rise to stardom for an upcoming tell-all biography. "He’s got something special. When he’s up there, he commands attention. All eyes are on Magellan.“
Via Jo Naylor.
Toronto Cat Confronts Pigeon Nemesis
A 3-year-old cat named Brooklyn has been waiting patiently by the window of a downtown Toronto condo in anticipation of his arch rival, a pigeon named Hank.
“Brooklyn has gone to great lengths to intercept Hank,” says Jamie Geers, a source close to the situation. “There was some phone hacking involved. Let’s just say he knew exactly which window to stalk, and the right time.”
The beef between the two is unclear, though The Fluffington Post has learned of rumors about an ex-girlfriend and a borrowed game of Trivial Pursuit.
Submitted by Lauren Hay.
