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USPS Suspends Friday Kitten Delivery

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USPS Suspends Friday Kitten Delivery

Bad news, kitten fans. The United States Postal Service has announced that, due to budgetary constraints, it will be forced to cease Friday kitten deliveries beginning in August. The USPS ended Saturday cat delivery in 2012.

“This is a really sad day for the USPS and for the efficient delivery of kittens,” said USPS historian Jaques Moutan. “A fully functioning feline delivery system is a vital necessity for a modern society, and I’m not sure that any of us will benefit from privatization.”

The USPS began cat deliveries in 1974 and added Saturday service to cope with demand during the kitten boom of mid-1980s. Demand remained steady throughout the next decade, spiking again with the arrival of e-commerce. But recent supply chain advances have enabled private carriers like DHL and FedEx to offer kitten delivery at better prices than the USPS.

Monday through Thursday kitten delivery will remain unaffected, but a spokesperson for the Postal Service told The Fluffington Post that more restructuring may be on the way next year.

Via Nathan Adams.

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Dog Chaperone Doesn’t Allow Funny Business on Date

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Dog Chaperone Doesn’t Allow Funny Business on Date

When asked by a co-worker to tag along on his son’s date, Mabel the dog took that task to heart.

“She doesn’t go anything halfway,” said Tom Wormly, who requested that the dog tag along and keep an eye on his son during a recent date. “Mabel’s commitment knob is always turned up to 11.”

Mabel reportedly made sure that the date was thoroughly chaste and wholesome, requiring a distance of two feet between the couple at all times. Not everyone was pleased with the outcome, though.

“I’m 27,” said Steven Wormly, Tom’s son. “My dad is a bit too overprotective. I mean, I love that dog, but she needs to butt out of my personal life.”

Via christianjosep.

Love animals as much as we do? Check out explore.org’s network of live cams on bears, baby birds, puppies, kittens and more.