Chipmunk Triathlete Accused of Doping

Chipmunk Triathlete Accused of Doping

World-class chipmunk triathlete Cheeks Malone, has been accused by the Federation of International Rodent Athletics of using banned performance enhancing substances.  Though Malone has yet to test positive for any illegal agent, FIRA indicates that numerous first-hand reports from former teammates and trainers implicate the chipmunk in doping.

“These accusations are baseless and without warrant,” said a spokesperson for Malone.  "Cheeks has never knowingly taken any illegal performance enhancers.  He is a natural talent who trains hard and competes on his own merits.“

If found guilty by FIRA, Malone could be banned from competing at the Olympics in London later this year, where he plans to represent the United States as a distance runner and cyclist.

Via Molly Goossens.