kitties

Kitten Secedes From Living Room, Builds Box Fort

In a bold move that has spun officials into a tizzy, a tabby kitten named Hank has rebuked the sovereignty of the living room and created his own domain in the corner. He’s even constructed a fort to defend this new jurisdiction, dubbed “Tuna Land.”

“We do not recognize Tuna Land as a sovereign entity,” living room councilwoman Terry Ackley tells The Fluffington Post. “We believe it’s just a matter of time before Hank realizes the error of his ways and comes crawling back. It’s very hard to run your own country, especially with such an extravagant fort.”

Via jaysendee.

PHOTO OP: Just Laying Around

Via Dr. Alan Wu.

First Feline Mind Meld Confirmed

Though rumors and speculation have been circulating for years, scientists have confirmed that two Toronto cats have successfully merged their minds together, creating what some are calling a “super brain.”

“Kennebunkport and Brooklyn keep their heads together for about twenty minutes and concentrate on matching brain wave frequencies,” says feline neurologist Audrey Simmons. “We could clearly see, using electromagnetic equipment, that they began to share one consciousness.”

Researchers are unsure what the cats plan to do with their super brain, though there is some concern that it may be used for nefarious purposes.

Submitted by Lauren Hay.

Game Company Sues Cat for Unlicensed Puppet Show

Rovio, the Finnish video game company behind the worldwide smash hit series Angry Birds, is suing Dexter the cat for putting on what the lawsuit calls an “unlicensed variety and entertainment act using trademarked intellectual property.”

More plainly, the company is upset over Dexter’s nightly puppet shows, which star characters from the Angry Birds canon. The cat has reportedly been putting on the puppet shows for the past two months and has been charging $5 for tickets.  Therein lies the crux of the lawsuit, according to legal experts.

“I don’t think the game company would have a problem – or a case – if Dexter were performing his shows for free,” said chief Fluffington Post legal analyst, Allistair Llewellyn, Esq. “That would fall under fair use.  It would basically be something like fan fiction and Dexter would be in the clear.  But because he is charging for access without a license, he has run afoul of the law.”

The case is expected to be settled out of court.

Via mseckington.