kitties

PHOTO OP: Kitten Hot Tub

Via Foxtongue.

Cat Lands Job as Tchotchke

The job economy, though showing signs of recovery, is still tough. That’s why Selene the cat was thrilled to find work recently as a tchotchke. 

“The work is hard, the hours are long, and the pay is relatively low,” said  close friend Chloe McDrue, “but she’s just happy to be back at work.”

Selene had been out of a job for over 15 months and had all but given up applying when she saw the ad on Craigslist for a “living feline shelf adornment.”

“She couldn’t believe that was even a thing,” said McDrue. “She emailed the poster anyway, but really expected it was some sort of scam.”

It turned out, though, that the advertisement was completely legit. A wealthy family had just redecorated their living room and was looking for a unique way to accessorize. The cat is being paid to sit on the shelf each day from 8 AM until 10 PM, with an hour break for lunch.

Via Corey Seeman.

Kitties Committed to Snuggling Despite Heatwave

Even as a summer heatwave has pushed daily temps into the mid-90s and above, two cats are committed to their daily snuggling routine. 

“Harry and Draco won’t let a little heat stop them,” said Abel Poutine, a close friend of the duo. “I thought for sure when the air conditioner blew out last week it would be the end of their snuggle ritual, but then the next day, there they were, all cozy in their cat bed.”

The pair have reportedly been snuggling every day since they were kittens. Clearly, they have no intention to stop.

Via aurinhamartins.

Cat’s ‘Hot’ Match.com Profile Photo Turns Out to be Fake

Earlier this week dating site Match.com removed to the profile of Phineas the cat, claiming that the kitty had violated its terms of use.

“According to our terms, all information included in member profiles must be ‘accurate, current and complete,’” said Match.com spokesperson Wayne Garvey. “That means no photoshopping, by which, of course, I mean no misleading use of shopping bags in your profile photo.”

Phineas violated that rule, according to the company, when he used a profile photo that made it appear his body was actually that of a barely-clothed Hollister model.

“Not only was that photo a lie,” explained Garvey, “but it was also very nearly pornographic.”

The cat’s ruse was found out when he went on a date last weekend.

“I thought I was meeting this hot guy with amazing abs for dinner,” said Marilee Thomas. “Instead I show up and there’s a scrawny little cat waiting for me. Sure he was super cute, but definitely not what I expected.”

She reported the violation to Match.com immediately.

Via tinah084.

Hotel Gives Free Kitten With Every Room

A hotel in Dubai is reportedly providing all guests with a kitten in a basket upon check-in.

According to the website of the Vice Admiral Sands Resort, all guests will receive a basket that has chocolates, vouchers for discounts on resort services and amenities – including a four diamond restaurant, a Jack Nicklaus-design golf course, and a full service spa – and an adorable companion kitten. 

There is a catch, though: the kittens aren’t actually free. The fine print stipulates that guests may play with the kittens in their rooms for the duration of their stay, but for anyone who wants to take the cat home, a charge of $129.95 will be added to their bill.

Animal rights activists were up in arms, until they were informed that almost everything you read on The Fluffington Post is made up.

Via chyron_chick_mmy.