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New Kitten Wrestling Champion Crowned
There is a new king of the World Kitten Wrestling Federation, and his name is Mittens. In a bout that was televised live on pay-per-view to over 18 million households, Mittens was able take the belt by pinning his opponent in the eighth round.
Via Malingering.
NYC Kitten Preschools Will Only Get Pricier
All parents know that getting your kitten into a great college starts with a 5-star preschool.
More private pre-kindergarten classrooms are cropping up all over Manhattan and Brooklyn to meet the needs of well-to-do families. The Montessori Kitty Kampus on the Upper East Side offers curricula in French, art history and theoretical physics for kittens age 0 to 3 months. Tuition is $12,500 per year.
Via levelwalkerkiller, Reddit.
PHOTO OP: Kitty Crafts
Via Mai.
Another Kitten Tragically Lost In Couch Cushions
In spite of warnings posted all around the living room, the couch at Matthew’s house has claimed another kitten. For the third time in a month, witnesses could only watch in horror from the ottoman on the other side of the room while the couch sucked the kitten into its cushions. According to the coast guard, once a kitten is stuck in the couch, there’s little hope of extricating it.
“I don’t know why Matt hasn’t gotten rid of that thing,” said one witness. “I mean, it has to be easier to get a new couch than to keep getting new cats, right?”
Via purplemattfish.
Regular Sized Cat Smashes Lego Town
A normal sized house cat continues its reign of terror in the living room tonight, after smashing a Lego village with no regard for the small plastic people inside. The mayor of the Lego town has declared a state of emergency and called for help from the national guard. Our thoughts are with the victims and their families and hope that the cat gets bored soon and decides to do something else.
Via jds-emma.
