PHOTO OP: Handful of Hamster
PHOTO OP: Handful of Hamster
Hamster Caught Cheating at Maze
When Igor the hamster finished the box maze with a record time of 2 minutes, 35 seconds, it was celebrated as a once-in-a-lifetime achievement. But this is the age of HD television: nothing goes unnoticed.
It didn’t take long for members of the media to start questioning the hamster’s result. Did he utilize a shortcut? Illegal equipment? Was he juicing?
After carefully reviewing footage from the 10 cameras placed strategically around the maze, it was clear: Igor cheated. He went up and over the wall at turn seven, allowing him to shave a full minute off his score and easily smash the previous course record.
Officials say Igor’s time will be removed from the record books. The hamster could not be reached for comment.
Hamsters Cast in ‘Blues Brothers’ Reboot
If there’s one thing Hollywood loves, it’s a good, high-profile reboot. Variety is reporting that hamsters Buttons and Scratch have been cast in the upcoming, Sam Riami-helmed reboot of The Blues Brothers.
The hamsters, who cut their teeth at Second City in Chicago, and also spent time last year at UCB in New York, are being touted as a brilliant combo to reprise the rolls made famous by Dan Aykroyd and John Belushi.
"If the decision to hire action impresario Riami as director was thought odd in Hollywood circles," wrote Variety reporter Anna Pitasco, “the choice of Buttons and Scratch more than makes up for it. They bring serious funny to the production.”
The movie is expected to start filming later this year in Los Angels, Las Vegas, Vancouver and Chicago.
Hamster Is Plotting Something, We’re Sure of It
Noctus the hamster is up to no good. The Fluffington Post can report with 95% certainty that the rodent is planning something.
We’re not sure what it is, but just look at him. Those intense, beady little eyes, the way he’s rubbing his hands together menacingly. Oh yes, he’s up to something.
Mark our words.
Hamster Pianist Sells Out Lincoln Center
Though she only just announced her one-night-only performance at Lincoln Center in New York City, Missy the hamster has already oversold the venue, drawing classical music enthusiasts from around the region.
Her concert will feature Rachmaninoff’s Piano Concerto No. 2, and there is talk of a special guest appearance.
"I really hope it’s Yo-Yo Ma," says Ashley DePalo, one of the lucky fans who scored tickets. "I saw them play together in Colorado Springs. It was amazing."
Via Nehama Verter.
Hamster Rescued From Tiny Wastepaper Basket
Police in Highland Park, NJ responded to a 911 call early Sunday, rescuing a local hamster named Max, who had become trapped inside his own small wastepaper basket.
"He had gone in there to retrieve a crumpled up page of his manuscript," officer John Donelly tells The Fluffington Post. “Next thing he knew, he was clamoring to get out. It’s a good thing he was wearing his Bluetooth headset so he could call in the emergency. It was a typical 825,” says Donelly, referring to the police radio code 825: “Trapped Hamster.”
Hamster Uses Vine App to Make Creative Videos
A hamster named Snowball has been messing with Twitter’s new video app called Vine, with impressive results.
"He’s made a few videos from inside his ball, inside his tubes," says Frank Shankman, a source familiar with the situation. "Not sure how he fits his iPhone 5 in there with him, but it just works."
Via Long Mai.
Hamster Credits Paleo Diet With Increased Upper Body Strength
Croatian weightlifter, Ljubić has been training hard to compete for his country in the Hamster Olympiad next fall. That’s why he’s been very careful about what he puts in his body.
"He’s been sticking to the Paleo diet," said trainer Štefek Vuković. "He says he is in the best shape of his life, and he recently bench pressed seven ounces!"
PHOTO OP: Happy Hamster