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Duck Sidelined for Foul Play
By Scott Friedstein, FluffPo Correspondent
According to sources, Ted the duck has been ejected from yet another game of pickup basketball for playing too dirty. Ever the competitor, Ted has proven notorious on the basketball court for his overly aggressive style.
"We warned him beforehand to tone it down," says teammate Anthony Marsh. "But around the second quarter, he started with the usual stuff. Throwing elbows, trash talking. Fouling on purpose. Someone had to take him out."
The duck was swiftly directed to the sidelines, where he continued shouting at players.
"They had to hold him back," says Marsh. "I’m all for being competitive, but Ted always takes it way too far. If he wants to play again, he’s going to have to learn to cool it."
Via pawpawprowlhowl. Originally published on HelloGiggles.

Duck Sidelined for Foul Play

By Scott Friedstein, FluffPo Correspondent

According to sources, Ted the duck has been ejected from yet another game of pickup basketball for playing too dirty. Ever the competitor, Ted has proven notorious on the basketball court for his overly aggressive style.

"We warned him beforehand to tone it down," says teammate Anthony Marsh. "But around the second quarter, he started with the usual stuff. Throwing elbows, trash talking. Fouling on purpose. Someone had to take him out."

The duck was swiftly directed to the sidelines, where he continued shouting at players.

"They had to hold him back," says Marsh. "I’m all for being competitive, but Ted always takes it way too far. If he wants to play again, he’s going to have to learn to cool it."

Via pawpawprowlhowl. Originally published on HelloGiggles.

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Corgi Playdate Goes Awry
By Scott Friedstein, FluffPo Correspondent
Lana the corgi just wanted a friend to play with.
Bored with the usual 9-to-5 grind, the dog logged on to Craigslist to find out about local playdate opportunities in her area.
"She found another corgi that was willing to meet up," says Jen Dwyer, a friend. "There weren’t any pictures attached to the posting, though. Guess that should have been a red flag."
Indeed, the playmate that greeted Lana last week was not a corgi at all. At least, not technically.
"It was a stuffed corgi," says Dwyer. "It took a few minutes for Lana to realize, but once she did, she was really disappointed. I’ll tell you, the Internet can be a weird place sometimes."
Via @lanathecorgi.

Corgi Playdate Goes Awry

By Scott Friedstein, FluffPo Correspondent

Lana the corgi just wanted a friend to play with.

Bored with the usual 9-to-5 grind, the dog logged on to Craigslist to find out about local playdate opportunities in her area.

"She found another corgi that was willing to meet up," says Jen Dwyer, a friend. "There weren’t any pictures attached to the posting, though. Guess that should have been a red flag."

Indeed, the playmate that greeted Lana last week was not a corgi at all. At least, not technically.

"It was a stuffed corgi," says Dwyer. "It took a few minutes for Lana to realize, but once she did, she was really disappointed. I’ll tell you, the Internet can be a weird place sometimes."

Via @lanathecorgi.

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Dog Reunited With Lawn
By Scott Friedstein, FluffPo Correspondent
In her old age, Kiki the dog has seen just about everything. Even so, she probably wasn’t expecting the surprise that awaited her late last week — the old lawn she used to romp on as a puppy.
"We’d heard about Kiki and knew she’d been trying to track down her old lawn," says Meg Horton, host of Reunions on the Oxygen Network. “Apparently they’d been separated for some time. We knew we could help her out.”
Using official records and photographs provided by the dog, producers were able to locate the quarter-acre plot in the town of Allenhurst, NJ.
"Kiki didn’t believe us when we told her we found it," says Horton. "She had to see it for herself, and luckily our cameras were there when she did. She was so happy. And the new owners didn’t seem to mind."
Via doubleUU.

Dog Reunited With Lawn

By Scott Friedstein, FluffPo Correspondent

In her old age, Kiki the dog has seen just about everything. Even so, she probably wasn’t expecting the surprise that awaited her late last week — the old lawn she used to romp on as a puppy.

"We’d heard about Kiki and knew she’d been trying to track down her old lawn," says Meg Horton, host of Reunions on the Oxygen Network. “Apparently they’d been separated for some time. We knew we could help her out.”

Using official records and photographs provided by the dog, producers were able to locate the quarter-acre plot in the town of Allenhurst, NJ.

"Kiki didn’t believe us when we told her we found it," says Horton. "She had to see it for herself, and luckily our cameras were there when she did. She was so happy. And the new owners didn’t seem to mind."

Via doubleUU.

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Doggie Bandits Make Clean Getaway
By Scott Friedstein, FluffPo Correspondent
According to reports, a family of dogs known as the Tennessee Mutts are still at large after robbing a local Petco. The career criminals and golden retrievers have become notorious in the greater Dallas area for their brazen thefts, mostly involving rawhide.
Witnesses say the dogs entered the store around noon, cleverly disguised as employees. 
"I really didn’t think much of it at the time," says Gina Rudd. "But then people started shouting, ‘Get those dogs!’ Apparently they’d taken all the rawhide. But they were just too quick."
Authorities tell The Fluffington Post that the Mutts snatched around $500 worth of treats before driving off in a rented Ford F150.
"We’re telling everyone to be on the lookout," says Deputy Sheriff Roy Hardwick. "If you see a family of golden retrievers randomly hanging out in the bed of a pickup truck, please contact the local authorities. Do not, and I repeat, do not Instagram it — you’ll only encourage them."
Via yellowarrior. Originally published on HelloGiggles.

Doggie Bandits Make Clean Getaway

By Scott Friedstein, FluffPo Correspondent

According to reports, a family of dogs known as the Tennessee Mutts are still at large after robbing a local Petco. The career criminals and golden retrievers have become notorious in the greater Dallas area for their brazen thefts, mostly involving rawhide.

Witnesses say the dogs entered the store around noon, cleverly disguised as employees. 

"I really didn’t think much of it at the time," says Gina Rudd. "But then people started shouting, ‘Get those dogs!’ Apparently they’d taken all the rawhide. But they were just too quick."

Authorities tell The Fluffington Post that the Mutts snatched around $500 worth of treats before driving off in a rented Ford F150.

"We’re telling everyone to be on the lookout," says Deputy Sheriff Roy Hardwick. "If you see a family of golden retrievers randomly hanging out in the bed of a pickup truck, please contact the local authorities. Do not, and I repeat, do not Instagram it — you’ll only encourage them."

Via yellowarrior. Originally published on HelloGiggles.

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Ferret Cast in ‘Hangover’ Sequel
By Scott Friedstein, FluffPo Correspondent
The Hangover Part III may be hitting theaters later this month, but that hasn’t stopped studio executives from planning yet another sequel. Early word is that The Hangover: Ferrets has already been greenlit, and its lead actor cast.
"We really wanted Part III to be the last one" says producer Daniel Goldberg. "The thing is, the demand for ferret comedies is huge right now. We’d be dumb to pass up an opportunity like this."
The film will star Hollywood heavyweight Eddie as a ferret who parties a bit too hard one evening, and must retrace his steps to find his missing ferret buddy. 
"It’s a real nightmare situation," says Goldberg. "His friend’s gone, his hotel suite’s trashed, and there’s a Bengal tiger just roaming around. Plus there’s a baby ferret that randomly showed up overnight. Never a good thing."
Rated R for language and comic mischief involving ferrets, The Hangover: Ferrets is slated for a summer 2014 release.
Via Lynahe.

Ferret Cast in ‘Hangover’ Sequel

By Scott Friedstein, FluffPo Correspondent

The Hangover Part III may be hitting theaters later this month, but that hasn’t stopped studio executives from planning yet another sequel. Early word is that The Hangover: Ferrets has already been greenlit, and its lead actor cast.

"We really wanted Part III to be the last one" says producer Daniel Goldberg. "The thing is, the demand for ferret comedies is huge right now. We’d be dumb to pass up an opportunity like this."

The film will star Hollywood heavyweight Eddie as a ferret who parties a bit too hard one evening, and must retrace his steps to find his missing ferret buddy. 

"It’s a real nightmare situation," says Goldberg. "His friend’s gone, his hotel suite’s trashed, and there’s a Bengal tiger just roaming around. Plus there’s a baby ferret that randomly showed up overnight. Never a good thing."

Rated R for language and comic mischief involving ferrets, The Hangover: Ferrets is slated for a summer 2014 release.

Via Lynahe.

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Kitty Cuddle Session Shut Down
By Scott Friedstein, FluffPo Correspondent
According to reports out of Portland, OR, two cats have been cited for indecent cuddling. Authorities say that Frankie and Duncan were found underneath a blanket, apparently hiding while they committed the act.
"You see this kind of thing all the time," says Officer Ray Birchum, who issued the cats summonses after receiving an anonymous tip. "Cuddling, snuggling, snoozling — whatever you want to call it, they were doing it in broad daylight. Cats think they can get away with it just because they’re cute. They are. But they’re not above the law." 
A representative for the cats tells The Fluffington Post that they plan to fight the accusations.
Via @mitdasein.

Kitty Cuddle Session Shut Down

By Scott Friedstein, FluffPo Correspondent

According to reports out of Portland, OR, two cats have been cited for indecent cuddling. Authorities say that Frankie and Duncan were found underneath a blanket, apparently hiding while they committed the act.

"You see this kind of thing all the time," says Officer Ray Birchum, who issued the cats summonses after receiving an anonymous tip. "Cuddling, snuggling, snoozling — whatever you want to call it, they were doing it in broad daylight. Cats think they can get away with it just because they’re cute. They are. But they’re not above the law." 

A representative for the cats tells The Fluffington Post that they plan to fight the accusations.

Via @mitdasein.

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Puppy Sees First Ice Cream Truck
By Scott Friedstein, FluffPo Correspondent
According to reports, Greta the puppy has spotted an ice cream truck for the first time. Sources on the ground confirm that the pup has successfully identified the vehicle and is now running toward it at full speed.
"Whoa, look at her go!" says neighbor Greg Quinn. "I wonder what she’s going to get — maybe a sno-cone, or a fudgesicle… or maybe one of those Pink Panther pops with the gumballs for the eyes. Do they still make those? Either way, she looks pretty hungry."
Greta was reported to be out on her afternoon walk when the familiar strains of Scott Joplin’s “The Entertainer” caught her ear.
"Oh, boy. Once she heard that, it was all over," says Helen Lloyd, a close friend. "Of course she doesn’t know that song, because she’s a dog. She still had to see what it was, though."
When asked what Greta was after exactly, Lloyd could only speculate.
"I have no idea," says Lloyd. "Maybe it’s one of those Choco Tacos. Or Push-Ups — those are nice. Or maybe it’s one of those Ninja Turtle pops with the gumballs for the eyes. It could be anything, really."
At press time, The Fluffington Post could not confirm the puppy’s selection as she was still waiting in line.
Via Uwe Maeurer. Originally published on HelloGiggles.

Puppy Sees First Ice Cream Truck

By Scott Friedstein, FluffPo Correspondent

According to reports, Greta the puppy has spotted an ice cream truck for the first time. Sources on the ground confirm that the pup has successfully identified the vehicle and is now running toward it at full speed.

"Whoa, look at her go!" says neighbor Greg Quinn. "I wonder what she’s going to get — maybe a sno-cone, or a fudgesicle… or maybe one of those Pink Panther pops with the gumballs for the eyes. Do they still make those? Either way, she looks pretty hungry."

Greta was reported to be out on her afternoon walk when the familiar strains of Scott Joplin’s “The Entertainer” caught her ear.

"Oh, boy. Once she heard that, it was all over," says Helen Lloyd, a close friend. "Of course she doesn’t know that song, because she’s a dog. She still had to see what it was, though."

When asked what Greta was after exactly, Lloyd could only speculate.

"I have no idea," says Lloyd. "Maybe it’s one of those Choco Tacos. Or Push-Ups — those are nice. Or maybe it’s one of those Ninja Turtle pops with the gumballs for the eyes. It could be anything, really."

At press time, The Fluffington Post could not confirm the puppy’s selection as she was still waiting in line.

Via Uwe Maeurer. Originally published on HelloGiggles.

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Area Cat Refuses to Box
By Scott Friedstein, FluffPo Correspondent
According to reports, Louie the cat has refused to take part in the oft-practiced kitty pastime known as “boxing.” Usually, a cat will see a box, lie down in it, and stay in that position for an indeterminate amount of time. 
Not Louie.
The cat’s owner tells The Fluffington Post that Louie outright rejected the box he was presented with last week.
"I thought he would love it," says Roger Blake. "He just stared at me like, ‘what am I supposed to do with this?’ I was really taken aback."
Though not unheard of, Louie’s behavior is considered unusual among experts.
"Louie should have had no reservations accepting the box as his temporary home," says feline behaviorist Linda Fiore. "It seems that, sadly, he has forgotten how to cat."
Via cyale4.

Area Cat Refuses to Box

By Scott Friedstein, FluffPo Correspondent

According to reports, Louie the cat has refused to take part in the oft-practiced kitty pastime known as “boxing.” Usually, a cat will see a box, lie down in it, and stay in that position for an indeterminate amount of time. 

Not Louie.

The cat’s owner tells The Fluffington Post that Louie outright rejected the box he was presented with last week.

"I thought he would love it," says Roger Blake. "He just stared at me like, ‘what am I supposed to do with this?’ I was really taken aback."

Though not unheard of, Louie’s behavior is considered unusual among experts.

"Louie should have had no reservations accepting the box as his temporary home," says feline behaviorist Linda Fiore. "It seems that, sadly, he has forgotten how to cat."

Via cyale4.

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Local Dog is a Total Chick Magnet
By Scott Friedstein, FluffPo Correspondent
No one knows how he does it.
According to sources, Flip the dog is a veritable expert when it comes to attracting chicks. Once an average border collie, Flip has intrigued animal lovers and scientific experts alike with his uncanny ability to pick up loads of chicks. 
"Flip has a skill virtually unrivaled in the dog community," says zoologist Kirk Horton. "Or the human community, for that matter. Once chicks come to him, they don’t leave. To be honest, I’m kind of jealous."
Friends say they’re baffled by the dog’s sudden talent.
"It’s like somebody flipped a switch," says Ryan Deal. "He never used to get any chicks — they barely even noticed him. But not anymore. Chicks love him."
And it only got worse over the Easter holiday.
"Oh, man," says Deal. "The chicks were everywhere. In baskets, in marshmallow form — it was like Christmas for him. But with chicks.”
Via YourFavoriteMartyr. This post originally appeared on HelloGiggles.

Local Dog is a Total Chick Magnet

By Scott Friedstein, FluffPo Correspondent

No one knows how he does it.

According to sources, Flip the dog is a veritable expert when it comes to attracting chicks. Once an average border collie, Flip has intrigued animal lovers and scientific experts alike with his uncanny ability to pick up loads of chicks. 

"Flip has a skill virtually unrivaled in the dog community," says zoologist Kirk Horton. "Or the human community, for that matter. Once chicks come to him, they don’t leave. To be honest, I’m kind of jealous."

Friends say they’re baffled by the dog’s sudden talent.

"It’s like somebody flipped a switch," says Ryan Deal. "He never used to get any chicks — they barely even noticed him. But not anymore. Chicks love him."

And it only got worse over the Easter holiday.

"Oh, man," says Deal. "The chicks were everywhere. In baskets, in marshmallow form — it was like Christmas for him. But with chicks.”

Via YourFavoriteMartyr. This post originally appeared on HelloGiggles.