You Will Not Find a More Stylish Cockatiel than Jack
That’s why you should follow him on Instagram. You won’t be disappointed.
Dog’s Fashion Sense Is Not for Everyone
Frankie the dog has always blazed his own path. Friends recall how he dropped out a school to pursue a career as a novelist. How he chose Android when everyone else was buying iPhones. How he rooted for the Denver Broncos in the Super Bowl, even while making his home in Seattle.
Lately, though, Frankie has just started acting weird. Case in point: he’s begun wearing a chicken named Morty as a hat.
"I mean, this isn’t yet James Franco level weird," said friend Colleen Murphy. "But it’s certainly not normal."
Friends have no idea who Morty is or how the two met, but they speculate that Frankie is paying the bird to ride around on his head.
PHOTO OP: Follow the Leader
BREAKING: Fuzzy Ostrich Chicks Are Extremely Cute
The Fluffington Post has just learned that baby ostriches are friggin’ adorable.
More on this story as it develops.
Submitted by Jonathan VanBallenberghe.
PHOTO OP: Happy Owl
Chicken Can’t Remember Why He Crossed the Road
Sammy the chicken crossed the road earlier this morning but once he reached the other side, onlookers said he appeared confused and out of sorts. He spent some time pecking the ground nonchalantly, to cover, but it was clear that he had forgotten why he crossed the street in the first place.
"I feel really bad for him," said Cheryl Hawkins. "Really, I do. Everyone is always asking him that question, and now even he doesn’t know the answer."
Sammy has been having memory problems recently, according to friends. Yesterday he crowed at 4 o’clock in the afternoon, instead of dawn, for example.
"It threw thew whole farm out of whack," said one friend. "We all overslept and then Sam cockle-doodle-doos at nearly sundown. Threw us for a loop."
PHOTO OP: Baby Peacocks
Via Zlatko Unger.
Local Bird Not Happy with Expensive Salon Cut
When the upscale Salon 23 started advertising services for birds, Mango was ecstatic. But after visiting the salon and dropping $120 on a premium cut this weekend, that excitement has waned.
"They told him he would look like an Macaw," explained close friend Sarah Bastille, "but instead he wound up looking more like a Chickadee."
It’s not that the cut was necessarily bad, said Bastille, just not what was advertised. And certainly not worth that much cash.
Mango has already left a 1-star review on Yelp and unliked the salon’s Facebook page.